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  1. #1
    scubadiver's Avatar
    scubadiver is offline Lieutenant Colonel
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    Default new sales page

    Aloha, would you please read my "newindex" page and tell me what you think as a sales letter. Also, please read the "preview" and tell me if I am giving too much or too little away. I might be in the wrong forum with this.

  2. #2
    ryanhitchings is offline Special Status
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    Default Re: new sales page

    Can't answer your question, I'm sorry! But great Website by the way! I'm looking foward to visiting your Hotel!

  3. #3
    bill2006's Avatar
    bill2006 is offline Lieutenant General
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    Default Re: new sales page

    -Your photos overlap your text.
    -It does appear that you have offered too much info, consider what is left to encourage users to explore further and maybe reduce text and add a link. Something like "to read more click here"

  4. #4
    Bethers's Avatar
    Bethers is offline Major General & Forum Moderator
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    Default Re: new sales page

    First - you need to make the words clickable that are your links - not just the pics above them! I don't think you have too much info there - but that shouldn't be an index page - but is better as an info page - and you can link to it in text on the home page with "reasons to visit Hawaii" or some such - and make it it's own page.

  5. #5
    Nite Producer's Avatar
    Nite Producer is offline Lieutenant Colonel
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    Default Re: new sales page

    1 the above feedbacks are great, follow 'em
    2 if you want to reduce the text which you better do, just put like for example as big title : Great idea to afford your stay in Hawai and then above it put a small text link read more or get more information. which will take to another page with all that information you got
    3 you should have your pages links in each page that will let visitors to navigate easely in your website.
    4 your index page looks great, but you need to give it more attractive elements like more photos.
    5 in your preview page you better edit your pics to give them a same look, cuz you have one withshadow and another with stroke etc etc.

    otherwise, very good job, I like what you are doing
    The Producer

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