Thread: Bush in Hell

One day in the future, George Bush has a heart attack and dies. He immediately goes to hell, where the devil is waiting for him.

"I don't know what to do," says the devil. "You are on my list, but I have no room for you. You definitely have to stay here, so I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I've got some folks here who weren't quite as bad as you. I'll let one of them go, but you have to take their place.

I'll even let YOU decide who leaves." Bush thought that sounded pretty good, so the devil opened the first room.

In it was Ronald Reagan and a large pool of water. He kept diving in and surfacing empty handed. Over and over and over. Such was his fate in hell. "No, George said. "I don't think so. I'm not a good swimmer and I don't think I could do that all day long."

The devil led him to the next room. In it was Richard Nixon with a sledge hammer and a room full of rocks. All he did was swing that hammer, time after time after time. "No, I've got this problem with my shoulder. I would be in constant agony if all I could do was break rocks all day," commented George.

The devil opened a third door. In it, Bush saw Bill Clinton, lying on the floor with his arms staked over his head, and his legs staked in a spread eagle pose. Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky, doing what she does best. Bush took this in disbelief and finally said, "Yea, I can handle this." The devil smiled and said "OK, Monica, you're free to go."

Good one

lmao...

Knwoing what Bush is like, he probably knew that it was monica that had to go..lol

LMAO !!! Goooooood one Rob !!! hahahahahahaha!

Hehehe Thanks, I find that the man often raises laughter without needing my help but hey jokes are good hehehehehe :)

I really enjoyed that one.

A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered her altitude and spotted a man in a field below. She shouted to him, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago but I don't know where I am."

The man consulted his portable GPS and replied, "You're in a hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet above a ground elevation of 2346 feet above sea level. You are at 41 degrees, 14.97 minutes north ******** and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude.

She rolled her eyes and said, "You must be a Democrat.""I am," replied the man. "How did you know?""Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to do with your information. I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help to me."

The man smiled and responded, "You must be a Republican.""I am," replied the balloonist. "How did you know?""Well," said the man, "you don't know where you are or where you're going. You've risen to where you are by expending a lot of hot air. You made a promise that you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. You're in exactly the same position you were in before we met but, somehow, now it's all my fault."