Thread: Where Is Your Cow??????

hi all i would just like to ask where is your cow cos mine is currently ski ing on the ***** alps for its holiday


please tell us all where your cow is and what its up to today

Originally Posted by allstarfaces

hi all i would just like to ask where is your cow cos mine is currently ski ing on the ***** alps for its holiday


please tell us all where your cow is and what its up to today

My cow is visiting her Aunty in Devon. That's where she comes from and she likes to go back there every Autumn, just to visit her. She's the only one left. It's a dead sad story really.

I've been 'shouting' you like mad!!

realy? like mad? realy ? ar you mad? lol im in an out in an out in an out in ......you get it
jsut sittin waitin for some one to take my old wee wee bed cos i got a new one he he no wee wee on it
oh my brothers cow is taking a test drive today in a new mini copper how cool is that hope it gets it
whats been happenin in the real world?
i keep postin bak 2 u but you always late at night talkin to your bestest mate in the whole world vasili the willy

if any 1 wants me im always on my CHATROOM

TO SPEAK ANY TIME OR LEAVE A MESSAGE LOL

Originally Posted by allstarfaces

if any 1 wants me im always on my CHATROOM

TO SPEAK ANY TIME OR LEAVE A MESSAGE LOL

Yeah, yeah. Went there, no Gaz. You're full of it boyo! LOL I'm off to bed, matie. Catch ya later!

Moooooooo-vvve over just a bit!

He's in his own chatroom? Funny! I thought for sure he was in the udder one!

come on vas where is your cow today shoppin ? swimming? on there motorcycle?

lmao mand im not aviodin you i am most of the time leaving my chat on so when i get back i can c whos been lol miss you you know

My Cow jumped over the moon last night, and
just landed in the back yard this morning!

jesus thats some athletic cow that i last saw mine ittin at the bar of my local pub chattin up some girl

How odd .. mine was in the field, soaking up the California sun . . . a happy cow....
(She just got back from her facial at the spa..)

your jokin a facial thats realy cool i geuss she thinks shes all ready to go out on the town for some fun now ey

Originally Posted by allstarfaces

come on vas where is your cow today shoppin ? swimming? on there motorcycle?

My Gurnsey went to Jersey on the Harley to do some Mall-Therapy.....she shops like a horse, but swims like a jackass!

your jokin a facial thats realy cool i geuss she thinks shes all ready to go out on the town for some fun now ey

Oh yessss. . . . she is going clubbing later on, I 'spect; quite the social butterfly.

well this morning my cow is down the gym on the treadmills at the moment, i know cos she just phoned me

wheres yours today?

Originally Posted by allstarfaces

well this morning my cow is down the gym on the treadmills at the moment, i know cos she just phoned me

wheres yours today?

Mine's on the early ferry from Penzance, sailing to the Isles of Scilly. She loves St. Mary's and has to fit in a day trip every time she visits her Aunt. They do a tour of the Island on the open top bus then stop for lunch at a nice pub, just around the corner from the harbour. If it's a nice day, they sit out the back where they can admire the beautiful view.

That ain't nuttin, boys and girls!
I just saw on the telly mine was being carted off having gotten stuck on the tracks underground, having made a shambles of the intimates department at Harrods with her silly shenannigans after starting a ruckus about losing at darts over lunch!
After all her runnin' round, she'll probably give me cottage cheese all week!
Udderly unbelievable!

Mine was out way late......still sleeping!

mine is going to sale water park today to do some water ski ing can you beleive it.................. its far to chilly for that

Originally Posted by Vasili

That ain't nuttin, boys and girls!
I just saw on the telly mine was being carted off having gotten stuck on the tracks underground, having made a shambles of the intimates department at Harrods with her silly shenannigans after starting a ruckus about losing at darts over lunch!
After all her runnin' round, she'll probably give me cottage cheese all week!
Udderly unbelievable!

LMAO!!!

Your cow has been very busy, EV!!

Originally Posted by allstarfaces

mine is going to sale water park today to do some water ski ing can you beleive it.................. its far to chilly for that

Your's must be completely bonkers!! Sale Water Park at this time of year? LOL

Mine is having a quiet day today. She's off shopping in Plymouth. Her and her Aunt caused a bit of havoc on the ferry back from St. Mary's yesterday. Drunken pair. It's that sherry. She hardly ever drinks and when she does it goes straight to her head. Silly cow. She comes home tomorrow. Oh joy.

lmao how mad are you , cant stop yourself havin these images of our cows doin mad stuff lol

got to get me keys 11 was 12 but they re arranged on me just now ggggggrrrrrr god im stressed out dont ever let me do this again mite go in there 2 morrow now ive booked a van for monday gggggggrrrrr
cant get anything changed over till i get a postcode for some stupid reason but it new build and it dont have one aaaaaaaaaaggggggghhhhhhhh
oh an i hate this foum now an dont mind sayin it i try to help an get pikd on boo hooo i aint givin any more advice lol not that it was any good mind rite goin to shop for headache tabs c u round ike a donut

Originally Posted by allstarfaces

lmao how mad are you , cant stop yourself havin these images of our cows doin mad stuff lol

got to get me keys 11 was 12 but they re arranged on me just now ggggggrrrrrr god im stressed out dont ever let me do this again mite go in there 2 morrow now ive booked a van for monday gggggggrrrrr
cant get anything changed over till i get a postcode for some stupid reason but it new build and it dont have one aaaaaaaaaaggggggghhhhhhhh
oh an i hate this foum now an dont mind sayin it i try to help an get pikd on boo hooo i aint givin any more advice lol not that it was any good mind rite goin to shop for headache tabs c u round ike a donut

Aw, is the big guy picking on you, poor Allstar. He's just doing his job. He appreciates that you're trying to help, but needs to make sure that they have all the info. There, there. Take a couple of paracetamol, you'll be fine in a fortnight. LOL

You are getting stressed out, aren't you? Calm down, deep breaths ... in ... out .... in ... It will all work out. I can't believe you've got your keys already, that's come around real fast! Keep your chin up, mucka, it'll all be okay.

Oh and ... out. LOL

Originally Posted by allstarfaces

i try to help an get pikd on boo hooo i aint givin any more advice lol not that it was any good mind rite

Tried that, and it didn't stick. My cow kept hitting me with her tail until I got back online.

Today she's passed out in the middle of the living room.
Been that way since last night, seeing the commercial about "Real California Cheese Comes From Happy Cows" where the cows play tricks on the houses next to the pasture, like ringing the doorbell and running away. She laughed so hard she fell backwards and konked her head on the hardwood.

Wouldn't bother me so much, but the snoring is rattling the windows, actually.....

Originally Posted by Vasili

Tried that, and it didn't stick. My cow kept hitting me with her tail until I got back online.

Today she's passed out in the middle of the living room.
Been that way since last night, seeing the commercial about "Real California Cheese Comes From Happy Cows" where the cows play tricks on the houses next to the pasture, like ringing the doorbell and running away. She laughed so hard she fell backwards and konked her head on the hardwood.

Wouldn't bother me so much, but the snoring is rattling the windows, actually.....

LMBO!!! You're good at this cow stuff, EV!! LOL

Originally Posted by Girlonthehill

LMBO!!! You're good at this cow stuff, EV!! LOL

Just milking for everything it's worth, Amanda!
There are fewer and fewer opportunities for me to contribute nowadays.
I see that my "wish" for a Fall Sale was even deleted....whatever!
Makes me so frustrated I can only work it out by churning butter by hand!

just be sure yuou start with milk from one of those happy California cows...

Ok, I keep seeing this cow thread......do you all own cows?

DOesn't everybody?

My cows sitting right in front of me (medium rare) HA!

OK, who's the Terry Prachett fan?

Originally Posted by C L

Ok, I keep seeing this cow thread......do you all own cows?

Better to own one than be married to one!
WHOOPS! Who said that???


Kinda like "Who's milking who?"

Better to own one than be married to one!
WHOOPS! Who said that???


Kinda like "Who's milking who?"

an evil twin???!!!???

My cow's wearing a Moo Moo today!
Keeps the flys at bay!

Mine is being really tempermental again. I wonder if it has anything to do with Mondays....

I left the house and she was sitting at the kitchen table smoking a cigar. Scary!

Originally Posted by Vasili

Just milking for everything it's worth, Amanda!
There are fewer and fewer opportunities for me to contribute nowadays.
I see that my "wish" for a Fall Sale was even deleted....whatever!
Makes me so frustrated I can only work it out by churning butter by hand!

I think it's still coming Vasilli .... they're just gonna surprise us one day!!

:)

Oooh, Vasili............you better say oops. hee hee

Aren't there some 330 in Chicago, hanging from walls and chewing their cud on the sidewallks ?

Originally Posted by bill2006

Aren't there some 330 in Chicago, hanging from walls and chewing their cud on the sidewallks ?

Yeah, I heard about them...nasty! The whole herd moooooooved in rather quickly and conered the cheese market.

MY cow is right where he wants to be-MT DIABLO STATE PARK... Ain't he huge? Folks, please meet Whitey-------

WOW!

Mooooo-ve over for this pet, guys!

None of you guys own cows, I know you a bit better now. You haven't talked about your cows lately have you? Ha!

Hoove do you think does not have a cow?
Show me how, tell me now!
Daves Girl above showed you hers, I can show you the udder one!

Besides....I'm still milking it, right?

You? Milking it....on what gold stools? You don't do such things....and wheres the trough....would that be the hottub? Nah....none of yahs have cows.

well its been a while since i told you about my cow ......well today my cow went xmas shopping obviuosly and got some lovely bargains for me for xmas presents oooo cant wait oh and apperantly the bus home was jam packed with shoppers going home mmmmmm then when my cow got home i rubbed its hooves and made it a hot chocolate in a big mug then ran it a bath then scrubbed its back ...the things i do

Originally Posted by C L

You? Milking it....on what gold stools? You don't do such things....and wheres the trough....would that be the hottub? Nah....none of yahs have cows.

You really go all out for your cow, Gary....I would simply arrange for a truck to come get her and take her to the local Car Wash, where she could get all cleaned up and then be blow-dried....(she still thinks that is what we mean when we say "spa treatment")....thank God!

Mine has been tormenting the neighbors all day.....keeps ringing the doorbell and running around the side to hide! Hilarious! Has the little neighbor girl thinking that Santa's elves are "practicing" already! I dread the time she gets tired of that and wants to come back in......it'll be the same old routine: eat everything in sight, **** on the kitchen floor, and then park herself in front of the TV to watch The Animal Channel, until she falls asleep and snores so loudly the neighbors come over to MY house complaining about the Rap Music's bass levels being too high....embarrassing! (Usually, I just throw a blanket over her while I answer the door and tell them it's just my fat aunt Bessie with her ****).

AND.....YES WE DO HAVE COWS!!!!! And we're proud of them!
(We all USED to have penguins, but the Union steward for the restraunt union kept trying to sign them all up, insiting that as Maitre 'D's they were required to join, so we sent them packing!)

my cow and her off spring had to go when we put the house up for sale but my pig is sleeping in her basked

Do you get postcards from your cow even today?

(I imagine it was rather hard to moooooove away!)

omg .... you guys are just enough to make me "eat the daisies" .... Until Ann popped in I had you all pegged for telling "tales" ... but Ann certainly adds a bit of reality to it .... so now I don't know ... "all tales" if you ask me ... and a whole lot of bull .... funny though ......... tell some mooooorr!!

You should see the udder thread, where CL's comments curdle!

Originally Posted by C L

You? Milking it....on what gold stools? You don't do such things....and wheres the trough....would that be the hottub? Nah....none of yahs have cows.

lol Vasili ... this one you mean?

< more like the sour grapes about Bill's appointment >

>> Should report it to the Morale Officer. Maybe a long bath or an hour in the anti-grav bay would help?

Originally Posted by Vasili

< more like the sour grapes about Bill's appointment >

>> Should report it to the Morale Officer. Maybe a long bath or an hour in the anti-grav bay would help?

lol ... u think, ... lol .... I think Bill would look mighty fine in his ***** Black Tux, floating about the Tea Room, making recommendations and mingling with the crowd ... that'd be an awesome position ...... don't u think ... I think CL was thinking he was going to be having cleaning duties in the tea room, no that is not what was meant for Bilien at all .... but at the risk of any further development,(roflmao) perhaps the Morale Officer should be notified, will do so first thing on Monday, I think Katlien is off for the weekend ... it will have to keep ... A long hot bath, why that is good for everyone. It's darn cold here this evening I tell you my dear, it's brrrrrrrrrrr.....

Bathing cows, scrubbing cows, taking cows shopping, sending cows postcards, cows putting houses up for sale......you guys don't have cows.

Wow! Somebody is still in a cranky moooooooood!

< Uh, and , ahhhh.....yes we do, it's no poo! We have cows, not wiggly sows, please! get it through your head all that we've said! >

Originally Posted by Vasili

Wow! Somebody is still in a cranky moooooooood!

< Uh, and , ahhhh.....yes we do, it's no poo! We have cows, not wiggly sows, please! get it through your head all that we've said! >

Am not....I'm just having a suga rush....lol

If you have a cow, show your pic with the cow, since you take your cow shopping and such, you probably have a nice pic of the two of you....correct?

Before or after we divorced?

LOL

"Psyche!!!! Made you think!!!!"
No, my Tammy is not a cow, no would I EVER even stand to hear someone else refer to a woman using that term....(I have been known to play "Public Police" in like situations, enforcing my own "policies", so don't think I am not willing to stand up for my honorable beliefs!)

Can't we just have some fun??? This whole thread was to feed our imaginations, and to point out how tightly wrapped some people are.....

Originally Posted by Vasili

Before or after we divorced?

LOL

"Psyche!!!! Made you think!!!!"
No, my Tammy is not a cow, no would I EVER even stand to hear someone else refer to a woman using that term....(I have been known to play "Public Police" in like situations, enforcing my own "policies", so don't think I am not willing to stand up for my honorable beliefs!)

Can't we just have some fun??? This whole thread was to feed our imaginations, and to point out how tightly wrapped some people are.....

lol Vasili....I am having fun, aren't you? Glad you are the gentleman. I knew you didn't own a cow. Nobody in this whole thread owns a cow. You guys did make me think....I thought what the heck? And it was so convincing, everybody just talking about cows, on their plate, in their yard....etc just like it was normal.............lol Good one! I liked it!

Actually, DavesGal (above) really DOES have a cow! (and there was one or two more)
Hers is actually rather close to where I am....San Ramon and Livermore are only about 7 miles apart.

You never know, Little One, you never know......so it's often best to smile and wink, just like how we all keep Santa alive and well year-to-year.....

Smile and wink, grain of salt............yep all good, She does? Well glad to hear somebody owned a cow....lol

Originally Posted by C L

Smile and wink, grain of salt............yep all good, She does? Well glad to hear somebody owned a cow....lol

Hey CL .... what about Daisy? .... lol ....

No cow??????? why on earth would i lie???



you have hurt its feelings now, just trying to find a pic of me and the cow in y album to show you

too funny .... is that a purse I see in that photo? Was she shopping?

Chopped in the Fridge !

*##*** **** #*#* **** **** wash your mouth out now young man !

Alright, heres my cow! Be nice to her.

oh no no no please you are in denile no not on a boat but you have to wake up and smell the coffee that ............im sorry......... is a sheep .....sorry sorry

My cow is having a typical sunday in bed watching t.v i dont know what a life my cow has

Originally Posted by C L

Alright, heres my cow! Be nice to her.

She's looking kind of sheepish to me .... but just could be my EYE .... lol

Eye'll be nice though, what's her name? Lammypie? lol

I'm sorry you Allstars.....you have it wrong this is a cow, Daisy didn't you say LE? Jeez LE, don't you recognize Canadian cows?

Originally Posted by C L

I'm sorry you Allstars.....you have it wrong this is a cow, Daisy didn't you say LE? Jeez LE, don't you recognize Canadian cows?

I'm sorry CL, perhaps it was me that was look "Sleepish" .... lol

If CL says its a cow, it's a cow, my dog is my cow, cause she bow wows!!

lol

Here she is..

As it's past four the cows are reclining in the stables !

Liz, explain what your cow is doing? lol

Well, Robyn ... she is a bit of a free spirit, wanted to try pole dancing -- and once she tried it, well, you can see the results...

Originally Posted by larazovich

Here she is..

please can we keep this to serious debates about real cows and not make believe ones with pics pinched from google please , thank you

now please all tell us what your real cow is up to today

Somebody needs a glass of milk and a nap...

lol Liz, free spirited cow pole dancing.........hmmmmmmmm real cows eh, ones that don't get their feelings hurt....how about this one, a real picture of a cow and she is saying helloooooooo.

461[/ATTACH]

Honey, she is a boy ..... a bull.....

This is really "Cowish"

But I remember when I got my first car. Of course, I had to take a trip, so off to Cape Breton I went ... and with my camera ... and boy oh boy did I see cows, I came home with about 150 pictures of cows ...

and that's no bull ....

P.S.

Liz .... those images CL are showing are "Nova Scotia Cows" .... they are different in our part of the world .... lmao

ssssssssh Liz.....Nova Scotian cow, saying hello....lol

Canadian Humor, lol....sometimes people don't get it, like in the game thread: Beez posted 4 letters, I correct her tell her to post 5 letters and come back with 7.....Vasili corrected me.....u see? lol

Perhaps it is the foggy air down here that makes me so dense....

Ironically, I have a 'country' place that is a ranch, and have many assorted animals there - horse, goats, miniature donkeys, pigeons, sheep...but no cows.
It is in Sonoma County, or Cownty, as we like to say, where lives Clo, who is quite a famous cow in these parts. Over the last 35+ years Clo has been a spokescow for Clover Dairy, and has been referred to as "Her Moojesty" and the "Quart Jester"
So, there you go..

Cows (holsteins) are in their stable.

That sounds pretty nifty Liz, sounds like alot of work for you, I bet the minature donkeys are cute. Famous cows? Like a mooooooooovie star....just had to say it, lol

Glad to hear you have a stable cow Bill. lol

Bill's Bull betters the barn, but his cow is udderly the cat's meow!

Let'see,
There was Elsie from Borden and the cow that burned Chicago down (and they still honor cows in that city with an art project of over 330 cows), there was Clarabelle cow from Disney and the cow that jumped over the moon (probably getting away from the butcher).

Man, I loved Clarabelle.
You old enough to remember her, Bill?

For all those men who say, Why buy a cow when you can get milk for free. Here's an update for you: Now days, 80% of women are against marriage, WHY? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage.

Men are like....


1. Men are like ... Laxatives ..... They irritate the **** out of you.
2. Men are like ... Bananas ....... The older they get, the less firm they are.
3. Men are like ...Weather Nothing can be done to change them.
4. Men are like ...Blenders You need One, but you're not quite sure why.
5. Men are like ...Chocolate Bars .... Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips.
6. Men are like ...Commercials....... You can't believe a word they say.
7. Men are like ...Department Stores ..... Their clothes are always 1/2 off.
8. Men are like ...Government Bonds .... They take soooooooo long to mature.
9. Men are like ...Mascara . They usually run at the first sign of emotion.
10. Men are like .. Popcorn ..... They satisfy you, but only for a little while.
11. Men are like ..Snowstorms ... You never know when they're coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last.
12. Men are like ..Lava Lamps .... Fun to look at, but not very bright.
13. Men are like ..Parking Spots ... All the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped.

(Just got this in an email and had to share in this here cow thread. Not sure what it has to do with cows....but....)

I love the county and State Fairs in Wisconsin....they always have life-size cows made of butter!

OINK!

Has anyone seen a cow mooooovie yet?

(Nooooo! not any barnyard videos, please!)
LOL

Originally Posted by allstarfaces

please can we keep this to serious debates about real cows and not make believe ones with pics pinched from google please , thank you

now please all tell us what your real cow is up to today

My cow has gone to Tesco to finish her grocery shopping. She said she wanted to get it done before the kids get off school. There's a turkey that's been giving her grief all year and she has him marked out for Christmas dinner. Don't mess with my cow. I've asked her not to go too mad on the booze as she gets a little difficult to manage when she's had too much. You may remember from her trip to the Scilly Isles. So there you go.

Originally Posted by Dream Lady

For all those men who say, Why buy a cow when you can get milk for free. Here's an update for you: Now days, 80% of women are against marriage, WHY? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage.

Men are like....


1. Men are like ... Laxatives ..... They irritate the **** out of you.
2. Men are like ... Bananas ....... The older they get, the less firm they are.
3. Men are like ...Weather Nothing can be done to change them.
4. Men are like ...Blenders You need One, but you're not quite sure why.
5. Men are like ...Chocolate Bars .... Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips.
6. Men are like ...Commercials....... You can't believe a word they say.
7. Men are like ...Department Stores ..... Their clothes are always 1/2 off.
8. Men are like ...Government Bonds .... They take soooooooo long to mature.
9. Men are like ...Mascara . They usually run at the first sign of emotion.
10. Men are like .. Popcorn ..... They satisfy you, but only for a little while.
11. Men are like ..Snowstorms ... You never know when they're coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last.
12. Men are like ..Lava Lamps .... Fun to look at, but not very bright.
13. Men are like ..Parking Spots ... All the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped.

(Just got this in an email and had to share in this here cow thread. Not sure what it has to do with cows....but....)

Well that is just hilarious Cindy ... Can't find an "error" in that what-so-ever ... lol .....

Love those hot pink shorts! lmao

Originally Posted by Vasili

Has anyone seen a cow mooooovie yet?

(Nooooo! not any barnyard videos, please!)
LOL

Can't say Eye have .... or one that "mooooved" me enough to remember ... lol ....

It's like in Petaluma, Eric, where they have the annual Egg and Butter Parade, and people dress up like butter.....

Eggs?? I suppose Mork was the Emcee?

Cows give milk, but upset cows give cottage cheese (or so I've heard!).
And besides, there is nothing else in Petaluma besides chickens and the turkeys that raise them!! LOL

Amanda's cow likes to drink, and Bill's cow likes to think....
Oh.....it is still morning, and I'm already pooped! I can't do my Dr. Suess right now...

That was a good one Cindy and Amanda, it sounds like you have one mean cow. lol you guys and your cows.

Originally Posted by C L

That was a good one Cindy and Amanda, it sounds like you have one mean cow. lol you guys and your cows.

She's kinda nice most of the time but, boy, is she mean when she gets crossed. That turkey has had it coming to him all year, waking her up at all hours. His favourite trick was to creep up on her when she was sleeping and scare her half to death in order to 'tip' her. I had to let her mooooooooove into the house. She's quite good to have around though and helps out with the housework. She's great at dusting and hooooovering. She's pants at cooking though.

Originally Posted by Girlonthehill

She's kinda nice most of the time but, boy, is she mean when she gets crossed. That turkey has had it coming to him all year, waking her up at all hours. His favourite trick was to creep up on her when she was sleeping and scare her half to death in order to 'tip' her. I had to let her mooooooooove into the house. She's quite good to have around though and helps out with the housework. She's great at dusting and hooooovering. She's pants at cooking though.

Jeez Amanda, sounds like some smart critters round your place....

No cooking??? Guess you can't expect a cow to do everything moovilously, yep, sounds like the turkey's time it up, whats he doing taking over the rooster's job anyhoo? Doesn't he know that there is a time and place for everything? Speaking of that....did you tell him yet?......about his place and time? I betcha he'll gobble it up! lol

About your cow,..... she is mooovilous!

Amanda-

I am worried my cow has gotten used to getting her way....she has been up to so much shenannigans recently every time she goes to town (I dare not even let her shop again!). Remember her losing darts at lunch? I have to wear a disguise whenever I stop in at Harrods now.....

I can imagine her coming home with a tattoo or some ring in her nose!
Lordy! THEN how do I handle it???

Originally Posted by C L

Jeez Amanda, sounds like some smart critters round your place....

No cooking??? Guess you can't expect a cow to do everything moovilously, yep, sounds like the turkey's time it up, whats he doing taking over the rooster's job anyhoo? Doesn't he know that there is a time and place for everything? Speaking of that....did you tell him yet?......about his place and time? I betcha he'll gobble it up! lol

About your cow,..... she is mooovilous!

We don't let the turkey know anything. She's made an arrangement with the butcher at Tesco's and has it all sorted out. I'm staying out of it. Lol Yeah, she's okay as long as she stays off the pop. I did notice a couple of bottles poking out the top of her shopping bag though so it looks like we could be in for some trouble. She'll be gobbling him up, that's for sure!