Thread: Joke : Psychological Christmas Songs

Psychological Christmas Songs


SCHIZOPHRENIA - Do You Hear What I Hear?

MULTIPLE PERSONALITY - We Three Kings Disoriented Are.

DEMENTIA - I Think I'll Be Home For Christmas.

NARCISSISTIC - Hark The Herald Angels Sing (About Me)

MANIA - Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and
Streets and Stores and Office and Town
. . . or Deck the Halls and Spare No Expense!

PARANOIA - Santa Claus is Coming To Get Me.

PERSONALITY DISORDER - You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry,
I'm Gonna Pout, then MAYBE I'll tell you why.

OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVE - Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell
Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle
Bell, Jingle Bell,
Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell
Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle
Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle
Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell,
Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell . . .

BORDERLINE PERSONALITY - Thoughts of Roasting in an Open
Fire.

PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE - On the First Day of Christmas My True
Love Gave to Me (and then took it all away).

oh this is so funny .... I am definitely Mania lmao .... this is a great one, I've never seen anything like it ... gonna be going out in emails ....

Thanks Mandy!

For the next 6 or 7 months you can bet that I will be one or another changing from day to day... lol... Damn hormones!

Originally Posted by MandyN

For the next 6 or 7 months you can bet that I will be one or another changing from day to day... lol... Damn hormones!

lol ... signs of Paranoia setting in .... better change that song to the 9 months of pregnancy ... lmao ....

awe ... you will have some great days for sure ... and it will all be worth it ... that is when you think about it 20 years from now, lol ....

Chapter 2 is coming along quite nicely ...

lol... I like that... the 9 months of pregnancy... well we all know what my true love gave to me on the first day... lmao

lol cute

OMG...too funny MAndy....good one

lol..good one.

Originally Posted by MandyN

lol... I like that... the 9 months of pregnancy... well we all know what my true love gave to me on the first day... lmao

lol Mandy ... just like you say ....

You sing for your soul!!

You can make a song out of anything .... lol

On the 2nd day of christmas your true love gave to you - "In Nine Months You'll Be Due" .....


lol

lmao... On the 3rd day of pregnancy my true love gave to me, 3 hours of vomiting... lol

On the 4th day of pregnancy, my true love gave to me .... 4 more inches ..... (okay, mind out of the gutter, the inches are around the waistline) lmao

tra la la la la la la la la



I singing for Baby!!.... not for my soul!! lol

roflmao... oh my... I'm glad you sorted that out, cause I was starting to hyperventilate... lol

On the 5th day of pregnancy my true love gave to me, 5 hemorrhoids...

Originally Posted by MandyN

roflmao... oh my... I'm glad you sorted that out, cause I was starting to hyperventilate... lol

On the 5th day of pregnancy my true love gave to me, 5 hemorrhoids...

omg ... I think I'm pleading the 5th on that one .... lol ... (oh that's nasty, thought he was "all that" .... lol ... I'd be giving that present back, lol ... yup ... reject ... lol)

On the 6th day of christmas, your true love gave to you, "Time off from all the things you do" ....

lol .... now he's getting nicer .... lol

lmao... got a refund on the 5th...

on the 7th day of pregnancy my true love gave to me, 7 doctors visits, who all want to poke and prod my stomach...

Originally Posted by MandyN

lmao... got a refund on the 5th...

on the 7th day of pregnancy my true love gave to me, 7 doctors visits, who all want to poke and prod my stomach...

lol ... must be close to christmas, all that sharing going on ... glad you got the refund ... that just wasn't worth it ...


on the 8th day of pregnancy, your true love gave to you, "false labour, complete with panting, sweating and those darn hormones acting up, in fact you broke his hand squeezing it" .... you might want a refund on this one too, but you're gonna get it anyway ... lol ...

lmao...

on the 9th day of pregnancy my true love gave to me, 9 bloody lectures, cause I wanted to play soccer and fell on my bum...

Originally Posted by MandyN

lmao...

on the 9th day of pregnancy my true love gave to me, 9 bloody lectures, cause I wanted to play soccer and fell on my bum...

lol

on the 10th day of christmas your true love gave to you, a full bum massage, 9 nimble fingers, 8 special punctures, 7 deep probes, 6 pinches, 5 feather tickels, 4 oil rubs, 3 tat a tats, 2 rubby rubs, and 1 butt buster, lol ..... (wow, your tenth day was hot) ... lol

oh my, we may not finish this song before the bubby comes, lol ... or maybe we will ....

lol

Originally Posted by LadyEye

lol

on the 10th day of christmas your true love gave to you, a full bum massage, 9 nimble fingers, 8 special punctures, 7 deep probes, 6 pinches, 5 feather tickels, 4 oil rubs, 3 tat a tats, 2 rubby rubs, and 1 butt buster, lol ..... (wow, your tenth day was hot) ... lol

oh my, we may not finish this song before the bubby comes, lol ... or maybe we will ....

lol

LMAO... on the 11th day of pregnancy my true love gave to me, 11 good excuses why I wanted to play soccer again just to get day 10 again...

Originally Posted by MandyN

LMAO... on the 11th day of pregnancy my true love gave to me, 11 good excuses why I wanted to play soccer again just to get day 10 again...

On the 12th day of Christmas your true love gave to you "A lesson in asking for too much, and you got nothing" lmao ..... ho ho ho ....

On the 13th day of pregnancy my true love gave to me... 13 new reasons to re-think pregnancy again...

On the 14th day of Pregnancy, your true love gave to you, a big kiwi pie, a relaxing cup of tea, and said you are "eating for two" and you look wonderful, really you do ... (awe, isn't he so sweet, lol)

Great one Mandy! I love it!! I too will be including that it a few emails out! and by the way....Congratulations on your Pregnancy! Your having fun with it and that's GREAT!

Like it !!!

Originally Posted by Dream Lady

Great one Mandy! I love it!! I too will be including that it a few emails out! and by the way....Congratulations on your Pregnancy! Your having fun with it and that's GREAT!

Thankyou Dream Lady, I am having fun with it... it's a wonderful experience, and I feel blessed to be able to experience it.

Originally Posted by nlnieu16

Like it !!!

Glad you liked it.

Originally Posted by LadyEye

On the 14th day of Pregnancy, your true love gave to you, a big kiwi pie, a relaxing cup of tea, and said you are "eating for two" and you look wonderful, really you do ... (awe, isn't he so sweet, lol)

lol... so sweet that, on the 15th day of pregnancy my true love gave to me, 2 thunder thighs from all the kiwi pie, and has to lift me up off the couch... lol

LOL Very funny!!!!

Originally Posted by MandyN

lol... so sweet that, on the 15th day of pregnancy my true love gave to me, 2 thunder thighs from all the kiwi pie, and has to lift me up off the couch... lol

on the 16th day of pregnancy your true love said to you, honey there is more than your thighs that need a lift, lol ... so giving you lots of support he managed to get those in shape again, the way they're supposed to ... lol ... and oh yeah it was uncomfortable, but you'll be better in the long run ... if he supports you now, lol .... roflmao ... I can see it now!!

Clanffa ... stick around, there are 275 days of this pregnancy, plenty of laughs to come ..... lol

Originally Posted by LadyEye

on the 16th day of pregnancy your true love said to you, honey there is more than your thighs that need a lift, lol ... so giving you lots of support he managed to get those in shape again, the way they're supposed to ... lol ... and oh yeah it was uncomfortable, but you'll be better in the long run ... if he supports you now, lol .... roflmao ... I can see it now!!

Clanffa ... stick around, there are 275 days of this pregnancy, plenty of laughs to come ..... lol

lmao... on the 17th day of pregnancy my true love gave to me, 17 reasons to burst into tears and none of them made sense... lol

one of them was because he helped me off the couch... lol

Originally Posted by MandyN

lmao... on the 17th day of pregnancy my true love gave to me, 17 reasons to burst into tears and none of them made sense... lol

one of them was because he helped me off the couch... lol

yeah and because you didn't wanna move, only wanted more pie, lol

On the 18th day of pregnancy, your true love gave to you 18 reasons to cheer up, and you knew he was right so you were so in delight you decided to celebrate with a chewy double fudge brownie delight, and a large glass of milk, and in fact you went for seconds, and then you had to undo another inch in your pants, lol ... and you started crying again ... lol

Originally Posted by LadyEye

yeah and because you didn't wanna move, only wanted more pie, lol

On the 18th day of pregnancy, your true love gave to you 18 reasons to cheer up, and you knew he was right so you were so in delight you decided to celebrate with a chewy double fudge brownie delight, and a large glass of milk, and in fact you went for seconds, and then you had to undo another inch in your pants, lol ... and you started crying again ... lol

are you spying on me?... I swear you can see me... lol

On the 19th day of pregnancy my true love gave to me, a bigger bra to fit my growing boobs... lol

actually, I think he gave that one to me for himself...

Originally Posted by MandyN

are you spying on me?... I swear you can see me... lol

On the 19th day of pregnancy my true love gave to me, a bigger bra to fit my growing boobs... lol

actually, I think he gave that one to me for himself...

lol ... Eye Spy ... is that what you mean ... lol ... Eye Spy, Mandy Eye, Lady Eye ... Eye Eye Eye .... lol ....

Okay ... gonna get good now ...

On the 20th day of pregnancy your true love gave to you, 20 pails to "throw up" in .... aha .... you forgot about that didn't you .... and you filled them all .... but he made you feel better with that gallon jar of "dill pickles" yum .... darn, it would almost be worth it to get pregnant, just to get those pickles ... lol

Originally Posted by LadyEye

lol ... Eye Spy ... is that what you mean ... lol ... Eye Spy, Mandy Eye, Lady Eye ... Eye Eye Eye .... lol ....

Okay ... gonna get good now ...

On the 20th day of pregnancy your true love gave to you, 20 pails to "throw up" in .... aha .... you forgot about that didn't you .... and you filled them all .... but he made you feel better with that gallon jar of "dill pickles" yum .... darn, it would almost be worth it to get pregnant, just to get those pickles ... lol

lol... nahh, forget the pickles, my craving last night was a big thick piece of meat... mind out of the gutter, it was a T-Bone Steak... I needed my Iron... lol

On the 21st day of pregnancy my true love gave to me, a raveness hunger all day long, so he has to work harder just to feed me...

Oh goodness, I can feel the vodalien coming out in you already ... this baby will be a huge FAB .... lol

On the 22nd day of Pregnancy your true love gave to you, a shopping trip to Sally Ann's, can't afford the malls anymore, you grow weekly, lol ....

Originally Posted by LadyEye

Oh goodness, I can feel the vodalien coming out in you already ... this baby will be a huge FAB .... lol

On the 22nd day of Pregnancy your true love gave to you, a shopping trip to Sally Ann's, can't afford the malls anymore, you grow weekly, lol ....

lol... too true...

On the 23rd day of pregnancy my true love gave to me, an unbelievable urge to fall asleep, anywhere, anytime...

Originally Posted by MandyN

lol... too true...

On the 23rd day of pregnancy my true love gave to me, an unbelievable urge to fall asleep, anywhere, anytime...

lol ... (I swear one of these times, I am going to write on the blah blah day of christmas, lol, how long before that happens to one of us eh!)

On the 24th day of PREGNANCY your true love gave to you, an opportunity for you to sing, (see you haven't been singing, because of all that "upchucking" lmao ... so he gave you some nice soothing tea and took you to the park, where you sung your heart out) and they loved it!!
You were feeling much better!!

Originally Posted by LadyEye

lol ... (I swear one of these times, I am going to write on the blah blah day of christmas, lol, how long before that happens to one of us eh!)

On the 24th day of PREGNANCY your true love gave to you, an opportunity for you to sing, (see you haven't been singing, because of all that "upchucking" lmao ... so he gave you some nice soothing tea and took you to the park, where you sung your heart out) and they loved it!!
You were feeling much better!!

lol... on the 25th day of pregnancy my true love gave to me, an ultrasound of an alien looking thing... lol ... can't wait for the later stage one when it looks more human... lol

yeah ... the FAB .... really has the look now ... yeah agreed ... lol ... but mighty sweet just the same eh!

On the 26th day of pregnancy your true love gave to you, a pair of higher heels, (he figured you were looking kind of low, so he thought he raise you up) lol .... poor hubby, no wonder they say the man feels the same as the woman when she is pregnant ... hormones flying out just attacking him ... lmao ....

Originally Posted by LadyEye

yeah ... the FAB .... really has the look now ... yeah agreed ... lol ... but mighty sweet just the same eh!

On the 26th day of pregnancy your true love gave to you, a pair of higher heels, (he figured you were looking kind of low, so he thought he raise you up) lol .... poor hubby, no wonder they say the man feels the same as the woman when she is pregnant ... hormones flying out just attacking him ... lmao ....

lol... shhhh... no sympathy out loud... he comes on here... lol

On the 27th day of pregnancy my true love gave to me, a proposal with a wedding ring cause he got me up the duff... lol

Originally Posted by MandyN

lol... shhhh... no sympathy out loud... he comes on here... lol

On the 27th day of pregnancy my true love gave to me, a proposal with a wedding ring cause he got me up the duff... lol

on the 28th day of pregnancy your true love gave to you, a trip back to the jewellry store, cause the ring he bought doesn't fit any more, you're swelling from head to toe my dear...... (nasty man, lol)

Originally Posted by LadyEye

on the 28th day of pregnancy your true love gave to you, a trip back to the jewellry store, cause the ring he bought doesn't fit any more, you're swelling from head to toe my dear...... (nasty man, lol)

lol... sounds right too, the swelling bit... lol

On the 29th day of pregnancy my true love gave to me, the look of looks cause he wants to get on the computer... lol

I'm going to crash on the couch for an hour... I feel an uncontrolable urge to sleep... lol

Somebody has peeked into my email, and is starting to understand my dementia.....unfortunately!

Great intro, Mandy! You've reached a high note early (or was that because I was stepping on your foot???) LOLOL

Originally Posted by Vasili

Somebody has peeked into my email, and is starting to understand my dementia.....unfortunately!

Great intro, Mandy! You've reached a high note early (or was that because I was stepping on your foot???) LOLOL

Naahhh... I'm a singer, so I can reach the high notes without you stepping on my foot... it was when you heard my voice croak, that is when you stood on my foot... lol