Thread: Smart Answers.....

THE 6 BEST SMART ASS ANSWERS OF 2006



SMART ASS ANSWER #6

It was meal time during a flight on Hooters Airline. "Would you like

dinner?" the flight attendant asked John, seated in front.

"What are my choices?" John asked.

"Yes or no" she replied. amoir



SMART ASS ANSWER #5

A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As

a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his

trench coat and flashed her.

Without missing a beat, she said, "Sir, I need to see your ticket not your

stub."



SMART ASS ANSWER #4

A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store but she

couldn't find one big enough for her family.

She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?"

The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."



SMART ASS ANSWER #3

The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled

down his window.

"I've been waiting for you all day," the cop said.

The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could."

When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a

ticket.



SMART ASS ANSWER #2

A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign comes up that reads,

"Low Bridge Ahead."

Before he knows it, the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets stuck under

the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a police car comes up.

The cop gets out of his car and walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on

his hips and says, "Got stuck, huh?"

The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of

gas."



SMART ASS ANSWER OF THE YEAR 2006

A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. "Now class, I

won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider

a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury, illness, or a death in your

immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!"

A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, "What

would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter

sexual exhaustion?"

The entire classis reduced to laughter and snickering. When silence is

restored, the teacher smiles knowingly at the student, shakes her head and

sweetly says,

"Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand!"

lol ManAlien .... good ones .... My favorite .... hope I never have to try it, but gonna keep it in my "Back pocket" lol

SMART ASS ANSWER #3

The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled

down his window.

"I've been waiting for you all day," the cop said.

The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could."

When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a

ticket.

Needed a good laugh after the day I had! Thanks!

Good ones!!

Glad you ladies enjoyed them....lol

See my new look above....lol......eh eh eh

lol love the bridge one!..wish I was quik witted like that

Originally Posted by Astraltraveller

Glad you ladies enjoyed them....lol

See my new look above....lol......eh eh eh

ManAlien - the man of ever changing faces ... lol

Who will you be tomorrow?????

lol

George Clooney would be nice :o)

Originally Posted by Lincslady

George Clooney would be nice :o)

lol Linda .....

Wouldn't shock me if that is who he shows up as ..... he is all about "pleasing the ladies" lol .....

lol..

Originally Posted by LadyEye

lol Linda .....

Wouldn't shock me if that is who he shows up as ..... he is all about "pleasing the ladies" lol .....

Sure will try......lol.....

Good ones. LOL

Originally Posted by Lincslady

George Clooney would be nice :o)

G...G...George......who.......?........C...C...Clo oney......roflmao....eh eh eh

Blimey! it is him! ....wanna cuppa tea? ...lol

Originally Posted by Lincslady

Blimey! it is him! ....wanna cuppa tea? ...lol

lol Linda .... blimey .... explain that now ..... and only tea .... geesh ....
lol

Well you could replace the tea with tequila.

Originally Posted by Lincslady

Blimey! it is him! ....wanna cuppa tea? ...lol

Ok Linda enough.....G...G...George.....Clooney.......hope you enjoy the tea with it......lol

lol you lot....its no ordinary tea! lol

OMG its must have been after midnight when I kissed the screen cos look what he's turned into.....scary or what..or maybe its the way I kiss ...oh my ive sucked his face in hahahaha

Originally Posted by Lincslady

lol you lot....its no ordinary tea! lol

OMG its must have been after midnight when I kissed the screen cos look what he's turned into.....scary or what..or maybe its the way I kiss ...oh my ive sucked his face in hahahaha

Oh my oh my what did you do to me......my face.....lol