Thread: Ppssssttt.....Laugh Quietly.......

Pssst...Laugh quietly!!

Man comes home, finds his wife with his friend in bed.
He shoots his friend to death.
Wife says "If you continue to behave like this, you will lose ALL your friends".

********************
Small Boy wrote to Father Christmas," send me a brother"
Father Christmas wrote back," SEND ME YOUR MOTHER"

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What is the definition of Mistress?
Someone between the Mister and Mattress

********************
Husband asks, "Do u know the meaning of WIFE??
"Without Information, Fighting Everytime"
Wife replies," No, It means, "With Idiot For Ever!!!"


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Three Feelings:
What's the difference between stress, tension and panic?
Stress is when wife is pregnant,
Tension is when girlfriend is pregnant and
Panic is when both are pregnant.

*********************
Teacher: Do you know the importance of period?

Kid: Yes, once my sister said she has missed one, my mom
fainted, dad got heart attack & our driver ran away.


*********************
Some women asked a man who was travelling with six children, are
all these kids yours??
Man replies; No, I work in a condom factory & these are customer
complaints.

********************

A Son asks the difference between confidence and confidential.

Dad says, you are my son, I'm confident. Your friend is also my
son, that's confidential!

*******************

Mother to her teenage daughter: I think this is the right time
we should talk about sex.

Daughter (Excitingly): Sure mom! Tell me, what you want to know.
Mother faints...

*******************

LOL.. oldies but goodies and still great for a chuckle or two.

Karen

lol

Originally Posted by Filtrex

lol

Shouldn't you be doing your homework young man?

Funny stuff, by the way!

Cute.

Spending too much time again in front of the computer instead of helping out around the house??? Uh-huh....

Originally Posted by mwalsh62

Shouldn't you be doing your homework young man?

Funny stuff, by the way!

Doing home work?......hee hee hee .......at nearly Half Centuary Old, I think I've done enough of that in my lifetime ......Glad you enjoyed the laughs....lol

Originally Posted by Vasili

Cute.

Spending too much time again in front of the computer instead of helping out around the house??? Uh-huh....

Hey Generalissimo.....good to see you again......glad you enjoyed that.....lol

Spending too much time in front of the computer..!! who?....me?....oh well no ......to busy at work lately and not much time to spend on the PC or helping around the house......lol.....but I see you guys have been having quite a bit of fun here.....lol
How has our ALIEN FAMILY been behaving with out THE LEADER around.....hope you kept them all in order....lol

Originally Posted by Astraltraveller

Doing home work?......hee hee hee .......at nearly Half Centuary Old, I think I've done enough of that in my lifetime ......Glad you enjoyed the laughs....lol

Was actually referring to me.

And to that you get a big fat PSSH

Originally Posted by Filtrex

Was actually referring to me.

And to that you get a big fat PSSH

My apologies to you both....big fat PSSH taken......have fun.....lol

Originally Posted by Astraltraveller

Hey Generalissimo.....good to see you again......glad you enjoyed that.....lol

Spending too much time in front of the computer..!! who?....me?....oh well no ......to busy at work lately and not much time to spend on the PC or helping around the house......lol.....but I see you guys have been having quite a bit of fun here.....lol
How has our ALIEN FAMILY been behaving with out THE LEADER around.....hope you kept them all in order....lol

NOPE ... we need you ... NOW

Originally Posted by LadyEye

NOPE ... we need you ... NOW

Hello there my dear 2nd in COMMAND.......good to see you too......it's been a while.......lol

Hopefully I will spend a bit more time here as from next weekend as I will be going on my annual leave for 4 weeks......lol

Can't wait ......try to bring some life back here......and get our ALIEN FAMALIY reunion........lol

Oh good for you Manuel, a nice 4 week stretch! Annual Leave .. NICE!! It's freezing cold here now, we had snow, turned to ice the next day, it's still here, we are expecting more this evening and the possibility of rain after that .. I hope so, wash it all away would be great. Lady gets caught on the icebergs in the driveway (LOL partly shoveled before it frost, lmao) anyway she can't walk 2 feet and barks because she is stuck again, she doesn't even attempt to pull herself free .. LOL ..

Getting ready for Christmas are you? I am not .. lmao .. seriously tho, I am not!!!

Looking forward to you cheering us all up!! You do it best!!
RUB-A-DUB-TUB .. LOL

Originally Posted by LadyEye

Oh good for you Manuel, a nice 4 week stretch! Annual Leave .. NICE!! It's freezing cold here now, we had snow, turned to ice the next day, it's still here, we are expecting more this evening and the possibility of rain after that .. I hope so, wash it all away would be great. Lady gets caught on the icebergs in the driveway (LOL partly shoveled before it frost, lmao) anyway she can't walk 2 feet and barks because she is stuck again, she doesn't even attempt to pull herself free .. LOL ..

Getting ready for Christmas are you? I am not .. lmao .. seriously tho, I am not!!!

Looking forward to you cheering us all up!! You do it best!!
RUB-A-DUB-TUB .. LOL

Yes getting ready for Christmas.....lol......and we are in the middle of summer as always with the occasional thunder shower.....

As for the cheering up I try...... as I don't like to see sad faces around here....lol

And I see you want to see me in a Tub again.......well!!....I will think about that for a moment ......you will just have to wait and see.......hee hee hee........
Can't be on here for long today as I got to get ready for a Midi-Evil Party tonight ......going dressed as a KING.....as a good king ......hee hee hee......

Originally Posted by Astraltraveller

Yes getting ready for Christmas.....lol......and we are in the middle of summer as always with the occasional thunder shower.....

As for the cheering up I try...... as I don't like to see sad faces around here....lol

And I see you want to see me in a Tub again.......well!!....I will think about that for a moment ......you will just have to wait and see.......hee hee hee........
Can't be on here for long today as I got to get ready for a Midi-Evil Party tonight ......going dressed as a KING.....as a good king ......hee hee hee......

Oh, how cool is that party going to be ... KING .. how appropriate for you .. well you and Lina have a wonderful time this evening, stay safe and a few snapshots of this event would be great, looking forward to seeing you dressed as King ..

Originally Posted by LadyEye

Oh, how cool is that party going to be ... KING .. how appropriate for you .. well you and Lina have a wonderful time this evening, stay safe and a few snapshots of this event would be great, looking forward to seeing you dressed as King ..

Thank you Holly we shall have fun........it's my Nieces 16th Birthday Party.....Will try and post a snapshot next week ....or maybe sooner.....

Ooppsssss...... got to go and get ready .......Chat again soon ......lol