Thread: Things I've learned from my boys

Subject: Boys -

The following came from an anonymous Mother in Austin, Texas...
Things I've learned from my Boys (honest and not kidding):


1.) A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4 inches deep.

2.) If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.

3.) A 3-year old Boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.


4.) If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong
enough to rotate a 42 pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape.
It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all 4 walls of a 20 x 20 room.

5.) You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.

6.) The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.


7.) When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh", it's already too late.


8.) Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.

9.) A six-year old Boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36 year old man says they can only do it in the movies.


10.) Certain Lego's will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year old boy.

11.) Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.

12.) Super glue is forever.

13.) No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can’t walk on water.


14.) Pool filters do not like Jell-O.

15.) VCR's do not eject "PB &J" sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.


16.) Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.

17.) Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.


18.) You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.

19.) Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not like ovens.

20.) The fire department in Austin, TX has a 5-minute response time.

21.) The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.

22.) It will, however, make cats dizzy.

23.) Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.

24.) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid.

Notes add:
a) For those with no children - this is totally hysterical!
b) For those who already have children past this age, this is hilarious.
c) For those who have children this age, this is not funny.
d) For those who have children nearing this age, this is a warning.
e) For those who have not yet had children, this is birth control

after raising 5 boys I tend to agree with e) ann

It's 24 that cracks me up the most, because that's EXACTLY what I was going to do!

Thanks Ann (wipes guacamole off screen)

Good one Ann
I must have been lucky myself having five kids.

LMBO!

......good one Ann!

VERY funny, Ann :)

I only had two boys and I can completely agree with those statements.
Thanks ANN it brought back such fond memories?

I have to say that I raised to boys and can add a few from them, but have many more I can add from my childhood with my brothers. I am amazed that my mom survived.

Awww, snap...my boy is only six...have mercy...showing all signs of trying to add to your list...LOL