Thread: Frog Time

There once was a little frog who wanted to take out a home improvement loan to fix up his pad. His name is Kermit Jagger.

He hopped over to his local bank, went up to the teller and said, "Hi, I'd like to take out a loan to fix up my pad." The teller replied, "You need to see our loan officer. Her name is "Patricia Black."

So the frog hops over to the loan officer's desk and sits down. When Patricia arrives she ask, "What can I do for you?"

The frog says, "I'd like to take out a loan to fix up my pad." Patricia asked, "What do you have for collateral?"

After thinking for a couple of moments about what he could offer the frog reaches into his little froggy pocket and pulls out a small white elephant.
"This is a very unusual form of collateral." said Patricia. "I'll have to check with our bank president to see if it's ok."

Patricia goes to the president and says, "There's a frog named Kermit Jagger out there who want's a home loan and this white elephant is all he is offering for collateral. What should I do?"

The bank president takes the small white elephant and after carefully examining it hands it back to Patricia and says,

"It's a nick-knack Patty Black give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."

A man walks in to a doctors office with a frog on his head. The doctor leaps up and says:
"Good grief, how on earth did you get that great ugly thing!"
The frog looks down and replies:
"I dunno Doc, it started out as a little wart on my bottom!"

LMAO twice! Very, very good!

A boy was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent over, picked up the frog and put it in his pocket.

The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful Princess, I will stay with you for one week." The boy took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket.

The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a Princess, I'll stay with you and do *Anything* you want." Again the boy took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket.

Finally the frog asked, "What is it? I've told you I'm a beautiful Princess, that I'll stay with you for a week and do *Anything* you want. Why won't you kiss me?"

The boy said, "Look, I'm a computer programmer. I don't have time for girlfriends, but a talking frog is really cool."

There was the annual running competition going on in the woods. As you can probably imagine all the fastest animals which could run quickly were first to join the race. We had rabbits,bears,foxes,squirrels,cats,dogs and the like. Last to join the race was a little green frog. When he showed up at the starting line, all the other animals laughed at him,bringing attention to the fact that he was very small, with short legs,and probably couldn't run at all. But he stood at the starting line steadfast and singlemindedly, determined to give it a go. The laughs were unmerciful in the crowd, everyone cackling and hissing at the little frog's expense.
Someone blew a whistle, and the race took off!! The frog was far behind,and as each animal passed him they told him to give up and go home. But he kept on running and running. The crowd still sneered and jeered. But the frog kept on running and running. Before no time at all, the frog was gaining ground, and all the other animals were amazed by his will to finish the race. And the frog ran and ran. Finally the tiny little frog had run passed the other animals and was unbeleivably first to cross the finish line. This was all happening despite all the negativity and his physical limitations.
At the finish line the crowd roared, and still the little frog stood strong and unamazed. This puzzled the judges. They decided to approach the little frog and get to the bottom of this. To their amazement they soon realized that the little frog was deaf!!! He heard non of the laughing and joking. He also didn't hear the other animals telling him to give up and go home. The little frog could only really listen to his own inner voice telling him to "Keep on Going".

Originally Posted by VodaHost

The bank president takes the small white elephant and after carefully examining it hands it back to Patricia and says,

"It's a nick-knack Patty Black give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone."

LMAO! Very funny, *****. Only problem is that now I have that damn song stuck in my head. LOL

Three handsome male dogs are walking down the street when they see a beautiful, enticing, female Poodle. The three male dogs fall all over themselves in an effort to be the one to reach her first, but end up arriving in front of her at the same time.

The males are speechless before her beauty, slobbering on themselves and hoping for just a glance from her in return.
Aware of her charms and her obvious effect on the three suitors, she decides to be kind and tells them, “The first one who can use the words liver and cheese together in an imaginative, intelligent sentence can go out with me.”

The sturdy, muscular black Lab speaks up quickly and says, “I love liver and cheese.”

“Oh, how childish,” said the Poodle. “That shows no imagination or intelligence whatsoever.” She turned to the tall, shiny Golden Retriever and said, “How well can you do?”

“Um… I HATE liver and cheese,” blurts the Golden Retriever.
“My, my,” said the Poodle. “I guess it’s hopeless. That’s just as dumb as the Lab’s sentence.” She then turns to the last of the three dogs and says, “How about you, little guy?”

The last of the three, tiny in stature but big in fame and finesse, is the Taco Bell Chihuahua. He gives her a smile, a sly wink, turns to the Golden Retriever and the Lab and says… “Liver alone. Cheese mine!...:)

i just realised its afrog joke page hahahaha! ...doh!

Originally Posted by Lincslady

i just realised its afrog joke page hahahaha! ...doh!

Dog, frog. After a couple beers, they all look alike. LOL

hic! ..lol

One day this frog was bored, so he decided to call the psychic hotline.

The psychic asked the frog "what do you want to know?"

"Tell me something about my love life" said the frog.

"In the very near future you are going to meet a very beautiful young woman" said the psychic.

"Cool, where? at a disco or a party?" said the frog.

"No" The psychic replied,

"Next month in her biology class!"