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Thread: Married Humor
      
   

  1. #1
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    Talking Married Humor

    Wife: "What are you doing?"
    Husband : "Nothing."
    Wife : "Nothing...? You've been reading our marriage certificate for an hour."
    Husband : "I was looking for the expiration date."

    -------------------

    Wife : "Do you want dinner?"
    Husband : "Sure! What are my choices?"
    Wife : "Yes and no."

    -------------------

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Married Humor

    Know where you're comin from... Nice one Bill.
    Don't aim for success if you want it; just do what you love and believe in, and it will come naturally.

  3. #3
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    Smile Re: Married Humor

    Quote Originally Posted by bill2006 View Post
    Wife: "What are you doing?"
    Husband : "Nothing."
    Wife : "Nothing...? You've been reading our marriage certificate for an hour."
    Husband : "I was looking for the expiration date."

    -------------------

    Wife : "Do you want dinner?"
    Husband : "Sure! What are my choices?"
    Wife : "Yes and no."

    -------------------
    Best Joke.
    Wife coming from out of station and husband go to receive his wife
    to station.
    Wife:"Why are you so sad,What happened?
    Husband:"Nothing"
    Wife:"Look!that man how happy he is looking and talking to his wife"
    Husband:"She is going and boarding the train."

  4. #4
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    Wink Re: Married Humor

    Oft bittersweet seem the fruits of Love......yet from the smallest seeds therein grows the mightiest of trees to weather all storms and tribulations, and under which there is refuge and solace in the shade.......so then, nurture the sapling, my son, so that the roots grow deep and true and that your life may be full of abundance!




    Sounds Biblical, but is really my own poetic paraphrase....lol
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  5. #5
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    Default Re: Married Humor

    Hmmmmmm........sounds like my life.

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  6. #6
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    Default Re: Married Humor

    wow how familiar.....all they all alike??

  7. #7
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    Wink Re: Married Humor

    ........I protest this thread! I'm not finding the humor in it at all......lol

    me tinks it's time to add a men's thread.......

    male famous sayings (there's only two) ha ha

    1. I don't know

    2. What

  8. #8
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    Question Re: Married Humor

    Quote Originally Posted by C L View Post
    ........I protest this thread! I'm not finding the humor in it at all......lol

    me tinks it's time to add a men's thread.......

    male famous sayings (there's only two) ha ha

    1. I don't know

    2. What
    3) Huh?

  9. #9
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    Default Re: Married Humor

    The most infamous male saying: I Do!

  10. #10
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    Wink Re: Married Humor

    Quote Originally Posted by Vasili View Post
    3) Huh?
    ...only have time for a quick post.

    You all know I'm joking ...... I read the thread, started laughing.....you guys all seemed to be in agreement.....had to mess it up. ha ha

  11. #11
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    Default Re: Married Humor

    4. later?

  12. #12
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    Cool Re: Married Humor

    Quote Originally Posted by whiteshepherd View Post
    4. later?
    I beg to differ....that is something a teenager says, usually in departing or when asked to do anything....I am sure you will agree that if modified slightly, it will become more recognizable:

    4) In a minute....

    and the classic...

    5) How much?



  13. #13
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    Default Re: Married Humor

    and don't forget ---

    6) Where's the remote?"
    Liz
    www.sebastopolparty.com
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    Ring the bells that still can ring

  14. #14
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    Wink Re: Married Humor

    .......hmmm, seems as though there are more than two......lol,

    Good one Liz....the remote, that's an accessory for men isn't it?

    what about the man made famous saying...................."I don't need to ask for directions, I know where it is."

    ha ha........lol

    ....gotta like it!

  15. #15
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    Talking Re: Married Humor

    Quote Originally Posted by C L View Post
    .......hmmm....the remote, that's an accessory for men isn't it? ........
    Really? I was always told it was what I would become if I didn't get on the program!



    (Obviously, she was right! Again...)

  16. #16
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    Talking Re: Married Humor

    Stress Reliever Girl: "When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your burden."
    Boy: "It's very kind of you, darling, but I don't have any worries or troubles."
    Girl: "Well, that's because we aren't married yet."

    ---------------

    Girl to her boyfriend: "One kiss and I'll be yours forever."
    The guy replies: "Thanks for the early warning."

  17. #17
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    Default Re: Married Humor

    lol ... Gotta luv it!!

    After a quarrel, a husband said to his wife, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." She replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice."

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  18. #18
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    Default Re: Married Humor

    Quote Originally Posted by Vasili View Post
    I beg to differ....that is something a teenager says, usually in departing or when asked to do anything....I am sure you will agree that if modified slightly, it will become more recognizable:

    4) In a minute....

    and the classic...

    5) How much?



    no problem ..

  19. #19
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    Default Re: Married Humor

    Oh, oh, oh, I really think this one is the best!!!!

    "Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are beautiful."


    P R I C E LE S S

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  20. #20
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    Default Re: Married Humor

    Quote Originally Posted by LadyEye View Post
    Oh, oh, oh, I really think this one is the best!!!!

    "Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are beautiful."


    P R I C E LE S S

    hehehehehe ... hahahaha ... if that's what it means then I never want to be equal ....

  21. #21
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    Wink Re: Married Humor

    ......hmm

    I love these little battles......and the guys take not winning so well....

    wtg guys!

    lol

  22. #22
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    Default Re: Married Humor

    Quote Originally Posted by LadyEye View Post
    Oh, oh, oh, I really think this one is the best!!!!

    "Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are beautiful."


    P R I C E LE S S
    I don't know about the exotic lands where you all live, but here in the U.S.A. there are a lot of women who fit the above.

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